Your senses are assaulted. You don’t know where to turn. You panic. You tremble. You pace. You cry. You hurt yourself. You chain smoke. You drink. You drug. You rock alone on the floor. You are staring out the window at someone else’s life wishing it was yours. You don’t want to get up today. You don’t want to go to work. You don’t want to be a mom. You don’t want to be a dad. You don’t want to be a husband or a wife. You just want to be you, but you don’t know where you went or who you are. Your whole life you lived up to expectations. You tried to be who you thought everyone wanted you to be.
So where did you go? What happened? Who the fuck are you?
Shit. What a sensation.
She was making out in the backseat of a cab.
“Just trying to stay warm,” she said.
They thought she was asleep.
He said his tats started writhing on top of his arms. Then pop! Lift off. He was through.
Didn’t anyone see the urgent messages flashing?
Okay. Let’s go to the mirror. Let’s find ourselves. Let’s do that together. No. Wait. One at a time. I want you to go first…
So there you are. You see you never really left. You just have to look at yourself differently.
Now give yourself a big hug. Wrap your arms tightly around yourself and squeeze. You’re all right. I’ve got you. Now go back and look in the mirror again.
I want you to see what it looks like to love yourself.
There you are… you’ve been there all along.
Do you see that incredible person standing there? Keep your arms around yourself a little while longer and just look at that awesome person. You are so beautiful it makes me cry.
Did you really think you were alone? You’re not. I hurt too. I hurt with you.
And so does everyone else.
Can you stay with me today? Today is enough. And tomorrow we will take this with us and that will be enough.
Now lock your eyes on mine and know that you are enough.
I’ve got you.
You got me?
*originally published July 2015